Report: Majority of Coma Patients “Big Fakers”
by: Bruiser LaRue (Our Man In The Street)
Colorado Springs, CO - When ex-photographer, Russell Park first started faking a coma several years ago, it was a temporary fix to avoid mowing the lawn. Now, after all these years he admits his reasons for continuing to fake a coma include loads of attention from friends and family members as well as making his wife, Nancy feel guilty for the rather lengthy “honey-do” list he was given on his birthday, a day most guys feel should be “work free”.
Russell isn't alone. According to a new article published in the American Medical Association journal, nearly 9 out of 10 male coma patients are "big fakers" who have no medical problems whatsoever but for varying reasons, simple enjoy the leisurely lifestyle found only in a long-term healthcare facility.
"The majority of male coma patients are simply worthless slugs who like to sleep in," researcher Dr. Brenda Washburn discovered during her study of more than 300 male coma patients. "Some are interested in the daily sponge baths by the female nurses, while others, like Russell are just avoiding any and all form of manual labor."
Russell, who has no immediate plans to end his fake coma, says sometimes he gets bored laying in bed all day, but then he remembers how much he hated work. "Nobody yells at you when you’re in a coma," Russell said. "It's just sympathy and attention all day long. You can't beat it." Russell does admit after awhile his visits become more infrequent and he becomes bored watching TV all day. At that point, he usually pretends to suddenly wake up for a couple of hours before he falls back into a coma. "That usually gets visitors to come more often and entertain me again,"
Russell said. "I believe it’s important to give one’s family and friends hope … additionally, by shifting in the bed and muttering a little bit, I get more gifts and it lets them know to turn the channel."
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